Wednesday, November 21, 2018

Better days are yet to come

I turned the BIG 4-0 in April this year, and much that followed has proven true to be the typical events joked about when becoming "over the hill"...

*extreme womanly bleeding month after month (started in January)

*crown to help deteriorating fillings from youth, turned into a double root canal
(might I add that this was the first crown and first root canal for me)

*first car accident for our first teenage driver

*more extreme bleeding, followed by intense pain, almost passing out, which led to 911 call and ER trip

*tube removal surgery for one of our daughters

*pulling out the "big guns" (hormone replacement therapy), to help keep me alive, which I've been so utterly against as a practicing Catholic and open to life throughout our whole marriage

*hysterectomy next, and saying "goodbye" to my womb that has held and nourished and was the first home to my nine beautiful Young ones

*pain in side and ovarian blood clot 2 months later

*blood thinners to dissolve such clot (to keep me alive, once again)

*not being able to hold my LAST baby for 12 weeks to allow myself to heal from my hysterectomy

*needing to "play it safe" and try to avoid a head injury (to stay alive) these next 3 months (not that I'm the crazy adventurous types, but the clumsy type that can get hurt with the most stupid things)

And those are just the physical sufferings.
The emotional sufferings have been just as present - rejection, loneliness, gossiped about, being judged, forgotten, left out.

So one may ask...  how can a loving God do all this?  I'm a good person, right?  Why must I, one who loves and follows Christ, be continually knocked down both emotionally and physically and allowed to suffer like this?

A good friend reminded me through this all, that I am bearing the wounds of Christ and serving as a suffering soul for Him.

So, although I'm feeling weak and tired and fragile and broken and a big MESS,....
I know that Christ loves me.  
I know He's with me.  
I know He will give me the grace to take one day, one step at a time.
I know He knows the bigger picture and why all of these things are necessary.
I know He will take my sufferings and help ME bear and carry them.
I know He knows.
I know He sees.
I know He loves.

And, I love Him back.  I trust Him with all this.  I pray for all those who has sent intentions and offer these sufferings up as prayer for them.  I have faith that better days are yet to come.  And until then, I will choose to smile and do my best to find JOY in these days of suffering.

++Jesus, I trust in You++


**I wanted to share this post, not to be a downer, but to show the reality of suffering and pain.  With social media, people can fall into the trap of only showing the fun, celebrations, joy and fluff, but we all know that life isn't all that.  There are definitely "lows" in life.  And this is just a look at my sufferings and lows and my take on them.  Life could be much much worse.  I am alive and breathing and walking right now, and so are my hubby and kids.  God has been so very good to us, so stay tuned to the 1000 Gifts he has continually sent our way this year too...**

Friday, November 9, 2018

Blessed with SIX years of YOU!!

It's Rose's turn now - who turns 6 today!!  

Her smile and joy and positivity are truly contagious.  You just want to be around her.  You walk away blessed and happier by being in her presence.  What a great gift she is to us all!!

Here's some picture fun from the last year with her...

++Thank you, God, for Rose.  Please bless her abundantly today on her birthday and every day after and help her to always know the great love You have for her and all of us too!++

Thursday, November 8, 2018

Extremely Grateful

Some days I just stand and pause in awe at how much God has given me.  
A husband who loves me and cares for me, who is my best friend.  
These 9 young ones who call me "mom" and help make me a better person each and every day.
The love that has just multiplied and continues to multiply daily in our house.  

++Thank you, God, 
for your grace and gifts daily!!!++

TOO Blessed to have a sweet TWO year old

Oh my,
Oh my, 
Oh my, 
Oh sweet little LADY! 

We celebrated two years at the end of last month with our sweet Lady!  Neil took the day off and we went as a family to visit a local pumpkin patch.  It was such a fun, relaxing day had by all.  How blessed we are for the gift of our sweet baby girl.  We thank God for the gift you are to our family!!!

Here's some pictures of the last year we've had with you....

++Thank you, God, for the blessing that Lady is to our family.  Please help her always know how much she is loved by You and all of us!++
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