Monday, September 10, 2012

"Are you done yet?"

or maybe it's....

"Don't you know what causes that?"
"How are you going to pay for their college?"
"Are they are all yours?"
"You must be a saint"

I have felt the nudge by the Holy Spirit months ago to share our background when it comes to these questions and I am finally getting around to it (thanks to a reminder from two wonderful blog articles I have read lately).  I had to laugh when my husband recently suggested an answer that will shut people up to the question - "Don't you know what causes that".  He told me to say, "Yep, and we're pretty darn good at it".  He said it works - it definitely was not what the person expected and shut them up immediately.  Hopefully it planted a few seeds and got them thinking and praying as well.

As you know, we are expecting our 8th child, 6 living with us now and one who has already made it Home. This will be my 7th c-section, which is a big "no-no" and actually was a big "no-no" for the last 3.  But, we trusted and prayed, and God blessed us with Ariel, Max, and Pookey.  At Pookey's delivery, my uterus was not in good shape at all, and again we were suggested to not have any more children.  We used Billings method of watching my fertility cycles and abstained at certain times each month, all the while being open to life and God's plan for our family.  We tried out best and were prudent in using Billings, however, God still decided to step in and bless us with another baby.  I'm so grateful we are guided by faith in God and not the fear that was put on us by medical professionals.

Another comment that I get quite often is when people declare proudly that they "are done".  How do they know that God didn't have more children planned for them?  They truly don't know what they are missing, plus the best gift of all that they are neglecting to give their other children - another sibling.  Not to mention how it puts a strain on their marriage (as they can no longer be "one" anymore and freely give of themselves to their spouse) and even more importantly, the separation they are causing between them and God. 

What is the point of faith if we are not truly going to have faith??

Do we understand the risks when it comes to having 7 c-sections?  Absolutely we do!  But, losing my life or our beautiful baby is the chance we are taking next to losing our soul to a grave sin.  My brother-in-law shared years ago that when it comes to fertility and trusting God versus taking matters into your own hands is truly a grave decision - meaning it will take you to the grave.  You will either be rewarded or will have to answer by your faith or lack of faith.  Heaven is our ultimate goal - I may make it to heaven when I'm 90, or it may happen tomorrow in a car accident, or it may happen in the next 2 months as we await for the arrival of our sweet baby girl or even during the risky delivery.  Only God knows the time and hour and place.  Same with our sweet baby.  She has brought so much JOY to our lives already.  God has a purpose for her - whether her life be short or long.  We are called to give our FIAT, to say "yes" to Him.  Or, we can turn our backs on Him and choose what is best for our lives on our own and rely on sterilization or contraception, when it comes to planning our family.  I would rather risk losing my life (as a martyr of my faith for Him) than to risk my soul and jeopardize the beautiful plans my Heavenly Father has for me, for all of us, to live with Him for all eternity.

Death is not something to fear.  And, if that is what God has planned for me or our sweet baby, then we are ready.  Death is the step we must take to reach our goal of Heaven.

"If you embrace all the things in life as coming from 
the hands of God, and even embrace death to fulfill his 
holy will, you will surely die a saint"
-St. Alphonsus Liguori

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